If you want to know how to be successful in life, you first have to commit to going all in. I didn’t cover this in the video, but study any man in history who did anything powerful or great, and you’ll see a guy who had other areas of his life that weren’t as successful as his mission. Thus, if you want to truly know how to be successful in life, especially as a man, you have to go all in, give it your everything, and leave nothing on the table or in the tank. The examples in history are endless, be it Ali or MLK jr with their marriages, Captain Cook with his family and never being there, and so on. There is no such thing as balance.
Now, when we’re talking about the characteristics a man needs to know how to be successful in life, there are 3 that aren’t covered because it’s not ‘nice’ to talk in these terms, terms of power, domination, and victory. We live in a society that rewards participation and condemns being too great. That said, who doesn’t want to be great?
Why even try to do something if you’re not going to try to dominate?
Why would you degrade what you can be and what you can accomplish because you want to be nice?
The reality is that dominating, high achievement, and greatness, is better for your family, and for society, but mainly for your family. You, as a man, have to do what’s best for your family. You have to rise above competition into the realm of domination, and if you want to dominate life, business, whatever else you’re focused on. This isn’t a goal, but a duty.
Your duty as a man is to be victorious and give your family the freedom, peace, and leg up they need to do that same. And these 3 characteristics are not only a must, but they’re intertwined.
Confidence is won, earned, not ‘thought’ or wished. You win confidence by winning. You get rid of the fat that’s making you insecure, you get stronger, tougher. You face your fears. You achieve things that you didn’t think were possible.
Men gain confidence by doing things that they didn’t know they could do. They also gain confidence by overcoming difficult obstacles. You’re going to develop real, strong confidence more in your tough times than when nothing exciting’s going on or you’re in the midst of ease. Tough times, and conquering them, build confidence.
Appreciate the struggle.
You need to have some daring. If you actually want greatness and to know how to be successful in life, in business, in anything, it requires vision. James Cook is a great example of this. He literally wanted to go where no one had gone before. Columbus, another example. He wanted to explore, to do what no one had done before him. The Vikings, again, notorious conquerors and explorers. You need both daring and ambition if you’re going to build a legacy. You do not need safety. You do not to aim low, at the things you know you can accomplish.
Have daring in every aspect of your life. Be a conqueror, a king, and aim to build an empire, not just to make a buck.
Aggression? How blasphemous! You’re not supposed to be aggressive! Yes you are! At chasing your goals and facing your fears.
Aggression is the antidote to fear. You cannot be afraid and aggressive at the same time, and if you’re going to be daring, you’re going to be aiming at things, trying to accomplish and achieve things, that will make you afraid. Set MASSIVE goals, and then AGGRESSIVELY go after them.
Don’t be timid, it’s a waste of the goal, of the dream, and of your potential. Be aggressive when facing any fear. Practice it. Practice it on your hunting trips, your hikes, in the gym when you’re sparring, be aggressive. Move forward. Don’t take a step backward.
If you want to know how to be successful in life, adopt those 3 simple but powerful characteristics, but also, go all in.
Don’t aim for balance. Don’t dabble. Give it everything you have and achieve more than you thought possible.
Who really knows why they came out with this report. It’s likely to try to move more people over to their causes, the social justice warrior type outlooks, the socialism, communism-type thought-police movement that demonizes anyone who thinks differently than they do.
Regardless of their insidious intentions, they’ve actually laid out exactly what you SHOULD BE, and should aim to become by describing masculinity by such virtues.
Of course, traditional masculinity is a blessing. Its virtues have helped create and defend freedom. They’ve helped a culture and species evolve to create the greatest, easiest quality of life in our history. It defends homes, builds buildings, roads, and bridges. We’re better off with more traditional masculinity, not less.
As far as the virtues they demonize, if you’re to live a good, happy, and most of all, successful life, you need these virtues – among others – in spades (I just made a post about this on instagram, like and share it here). If that’s toxic, be that.
Why You Should Be Toxic
You will not live a good life if your emotions control you. That’s stoicism. It’s taking control of how you react to events rather than having them ruin you and control your life. It’s the path to happiness, success, meaning, fulfillment, and purpose.
You will not provide for your family, feel fulfilled, or benefit your society if you’re not competitive. You will not improve who you are – which is why we’re here, to become better today than we were yesterday – if you don’t have any competitive bone in your body. Our society will also not improve without competition.
Dominance is simply leadership. You take command, you lead, you lift others up with you. You need to be dominant. You need to be a force, an alpha male, a leader. If you do not lead, someone worse will, someone weaker, someone who isn’t as good as you are, will take the reigns and dominate. You also should not ‘attempt’ things. Do not try, do. Dominate your competition. That’s the act of winning. Why do anything if you’re not going to go all in?
It’s the antidote to fear. You will not live a good life if you’re timid and afraid. Your fears need to be met with aggression. Aggression is a powerful tool, without it you’re a victim to others, and to your fears. Aggression is also necessary to defeat those who oppose you, those who aim to do you or your loved ones harm. Use it.
All of the great men in history, who led us to prosperity and peace, would be called toxic by today’s standards. Theodore Roosevelt, Churchill, Be great. Don’t be soft.
How to increase your productivity (and be more motivated). If you want to know how to increase your productivity and be more motivated, you have to be ready for a simple, clear, call-to-action: do less. Not do less work, but focus on fewer tasks. When you know how to increase your productivity, you’re simply then tasked with doing it. And “it” is very simple, even easy. You just have to get out of your own way.
Motivation isn’t just a feeling, it’s excitement, both about what we’re aiming at, the scope of our big goals and dreams, and what we’ve achieved. Thus, the more you accomplish, the more motivated you feel. That happens within a lifetime, a year, and a day. When you accomplish little, you get frustrated, less motivated, and discouraged. You start to feel like that little voice in your head telling you you’re not worthy of what you want to accomplish, is right.
It isn’t. You are worthy of what you want, you’re just getting in your own way.
That’s the thing that most people have to understand and accept, that success isn’t luck or where you’re born, and it is a duty. We each have a duty to end our life farther ahead than where we began it. We need success like we need oxygen, and the biggest roadblock is often our lack of belief, self-confidence and focus.
When asked to describe in one word what they attributed their success to, both Bill Gates and Warren Buffett wrote the same, single, simple word: focus. It’s focus that eludes most people, especially today. We have an endless amount of things we can focus on. Even as I write this I can search for something, go on Facebook or Youtube and watch videos, find songs, avoid the work I need to be doing.
To compound that, there are also far more options when it comes to what we can focus on in our lives than there ever have been. We used to farm. Now there are endless amounts of careers we can pursue. Often times we face adversity in a single field, which leads us to question whether or not it’s right for us, leading to quitting, changing careers, and starting from scratch all over again.
If you want to know how to increase your productivity and get more motivated, the first thing you need is focus.
That is, focus on a single thing, only a single thing, for as long as you need to complete it.
The One Thing
Achievement is a must, and you cannot achieve what you want to achieve, as fast as you want to achieve it, with divided attention.
When it comes to increasing your productivity, efficiency is everything. We all know this, but we don’t take the necessary steps to make it the only option.
When I’m writing, the internet is off. My phone is somewhere far away, on mute. Distractions aren’t available because if they are, I know I’ll get distracted. I’m not that good to have the options around me to get distracted and avoid them, so they’re not around me.
By focusing on one thing in your day you’re going to achieve more, in less time. You’ll feel the pride that comes with doing work well, which will motivate you. You won’t feel the stress that comes from not getting your work done. You won’t have that stress crush your energy levels.
If you want to know how to increase your productivity, it begins and ends with focus. That’s the magic formula for success, motivation, and achievement. Focus. Focus on a single thing, especially in the run of a day, and you’ll be shocked at how much work you can get done.
How to set massive goals and achieve them. Every man needs to know how to set massive goals and achieve them.
Set Your Massive Goals Every Day
Write down your wildest, most audacious dreams, even if you don’t think you can achieve them, down every single morning and every single night. This isn’t the law of attraction. This isn’t dreaming, it’s actively keeping your ideals in your mind, and as they change, as you write more of them more often, and some fade, it becomes clear what goals you should aim at, and which ones you should drop.
Setting massive goals also keeps you motivated. When you’re excited about something, anything, where you’re headed, what you’re working on, even possibilities, you have access to energy that caffeine can’t give you. Nothing can give you the same energy as excitement. It will allow you to get up earlier, work harder, and achieve those massive goals someday. You need excitement. You need motivation. And you need to be inspired. Keeping your eye on the future, not the past, and the massive future you’re creating, gives you the energy you need to actually achieve that massive goal.
Ambitions Are Why You’re Here
Your ambitions aren’t just dreams, they’re insight into why you’re here and what you’re here to do. You need to listen to your dreams, goals, and your ambition. Don’t brush it off as a lie. It isn’t a lie. It’s the truth, the thing you need to do no matter what everyone else tells you that you should do. Write your ambitions down every morning and every day and keep moving forward toward them.
Structure Your Day At the End of Every Day
This isn’t covered in the video, but a part of achieving your massive goals is setting the smaller tasks that need to be accomplished to actually achieve them. Don’t plan your day on the day or in the morning, plan your day at the end of your work day. You’ve just finished a work day, you know what you have to do, it’s far better to take this time to plan your goals than wasting time the following day, and likely planning the wrong things.
Don’t Tell Anyone!
They’re called, Identity Goals, and by telling people someone, you see them as having seen you as having already achieved the goal. Plus, you have a small sense of having achieved it as well. Have a few confidants that you tell your goals, but even that’s not necessary. It’s better for you and your goals if you keep them to yourself and just achieve them.
By keeping your goals to yourself, you keep the fire going. You don’t quell the dream. You don’t crush it before you even take the steps you need to take to get after it. Think about all of those poor souls who talk more than they do. You know who they are. You probably hate to be around them. Their words are empty, and it’s not just because they like to talk about their goals, it’s because of how the act of talking about goals ruins the energy, the fire, that should be fueled through action, not words.
Be one of the few who DOESN’T tell his friends and everyone in between his massive goals. Be the one of the few who’s too busy working on achieving them to be gabbing about them.
Work hard. Work in silence. Achieve your massive goals!
My opinion on who you are doesn’t matter, not one bit. But other than maybe your wife, your kids, and your folks, no one’s opinions should matter, especially someone you don’t know. That said, be whoever you want to be, whatever you want to be, so long as it’s genuinely who you want to be.
Don’t diminish this Self because of upbringing or surrounding. Don’t settle for something you know you can do, aim higher. Don’t allow society, including advertising and media, movies and online personalities, to sway what you want for yourself. Spend time thinking about your ideal, and get after it.
But, at the end of the day, there’s one thing you cannot be, and that is lazy.
The Definition of Living
Living is an action, not a state of being. You’re not living if you’re waiting to do something, waiting to receive something. You’re living if you’re pursuing something.
The pursuit can be life. It can be what puts wind in your sails. The pursuit can be your craft, your work, improving at what your soul tells you you’re here to do, or simply what puts food on your family’s table.
The object of that pursuit doesn’t really matter. It may not make you feel fulfilled initially, but as you discover the nuances of the craft or goal, as you take mastering it as a challenge, it will.
Even if you don’t have an ideal or a goal, however, you cannot sit on your hands, you cannot be lazy.
Laziness has never won anyone anything. It has only wasted potential and talent, made life meaningless and pointless, something that would have been better off if it were given to someone who passed at a young age or never made it out the womb.
It takes those goals and dreams and makes them an impossibility.
Take Pride in Working Hard
“If a man is called to be a street sweeper, he should sweep streets even as a Michaelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, ‘Here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.” Martin Luther King Jr.
Take pride in working hard. Take pride in doing whatever it is that you do, well.
The Romans saw it as a man’s duty to be excellent in all things. That is, keep your house in order, your room clean, wake up early and work hard.
Do your best in the most important aspects of your life, and those that seem insignificant.
Define every aspect of your life, break them apart, and determine how you can improve in each of them.
You do not have to be bad in one area to be great in another.
It’s a myth.
You can be great at everything, excellent in all things; you can have it all.
If your friends are poor, you’re likely going to be poor. If they’re negative, you’re likely going to be the same. If they’re envious and weak, then that’ll probably rub off, but it doesn’t have to.
People state these platitudes as laws, but they aren’t.
The way you live should influence others, but how they live does not have to influence you, if you don’t want it to.
That said, we often curb our aspirations to fit those we’re in contact with.
We settle. We see the hard work that massive success demands, and we opt instead for an easier, more mediocre lifestyle.
Again, be whomever you want to be, whatever you want to be, just don’t curb your desires for fear of effort.
Effort is good. Effort is life, it’s living, it’s serving, and it’s showing those who’ve sacrificed something, anything, to get you here today, alive and well.
Pay It Back
At the end of the Lost Art of Discipline (get it on amazon here) I talk about how awesome my parents are, but also that settling, setting mediocre goals and giving average effort, is more or less a slap in the face of the work they did to raise me well.
If you think about it a little deeper, it’s a slap in the face of the brave men who fought in WW2, to fight against evil and for freedom, and even though I may not know them, they somehow made my life better, and my life possible.
It’s a slap in the face of my grandparents on both sides, if I were to aim for mediocre goals and give average effort.
We can go back to my ancestors, or the man who saved one of them, or stood up for one of them.
No matter how you spin it, you and I both owe a lot of people a lot of effort to pay back their sacrifice that enabled us to be alive, that gave us the opportunities we now have, whether we’re aware of them or not.
We pay back those sacrifices by working hard, by not being lazy, by moving forward, by not quitting.
So, be whoever the hell you want to be, just don’t you dare be lazy.
How to be more productive, even when you’re tired. Everyone wants to know how to be more productive, and many of us know how, in theory, but we don’t do it. If you want to know how to be more productive, even when you’re tired, depressed, and lethargic, it begins the night before, when you plan your day.
Never plan your day the morning of. And every day should have a plan. I talk about it a lot in my book, the Lost Art of Discipline. If you don’t have a very simple plan, usually 1-2 important things that you have to do in the run of a day, then you’re going to do the wrong things. These things or tasks should be important. They should bring you closer to your massive goal. But once you identify what you have to do, the thinking about what you have to do is OVER.
Now, you shut off your brain and work. You no longer need to think about what has to be done, you did that the night before. Now, all you have to do is sit down and focus on the SINGLE thing that has to get done first. And there must be order! Never attempt to do more than one thing at a time if you want to be productive.
Shut off the phone. Shut off the internet if you can. Shut your mind off as far as thinking about what you should be doing, you know what you should be doing, now do it. It’s tough to do when you’re tired, and when your mind wants to wander. But is it? Meh, not really. Focusing isn’t that tough, it’s just something you do. You don’t think about anything else but the thing you’re to do in the moment.
If you have an idea that doesn’t pertain to the task, that you should write down, write it down and then get back to work.
Set a Timer. That is, create a work block of, say, 30 minutes, and focus for the entire thirty minutes. When the timer goes off, get up, move around, get outside, go to the gym, do something, just move away from your desk. Then, at your next work block, do the exact same thing, set a timer, focus on a single thing until that timer rings. By giving yourself a time frame, you have a challenge that isn’t endless. You CAN focus for 30 minutes, it’s tougher to focus if you don’t know how long you have to focus for.