The title of the article isn’t very nice. ‘Tis a bit of a slap in the face, a bit condescending, and very condemning. I cannot write an article with that title from a holier than thou stance or position. There are many times in my life where I’m an outright pussy. Where I sleep in past my alarm, forgo adventure because of fear, or choose the easy path while the more difficult one is far more beneficial to my self-development and for the welfare of others in my life.

Though I think it’s a ridiculous act, there are times when I complain. There are times when I talk about others or compare myself to others.

I’m far from the ideal, which is precisely why it’s so important to have articles like this; to clearly determine what is good for a man to do and think, and what is bad. It doesn’t mean we’re going to be tough and gritty all of the time. There will be days where we don’t do our chores, where the yard work is left un-done, where we quit before our work is complete. But so long as we know what the battle lines are, we can fight.

Too many in our society don’t know what weakness is. They don’t know what it is because it’s the norm. It’s what everyone around them does, it’s how they think, it’s who they are and what they expect from themselves.

Realize this:

If you live the life of a pussy, you’re going to live the life of a dependent. You’re going to live a life where others are in control of your present and your future. You’re going to be envious and cynical. You’re never going to realize the talents you possess or the opportunities that have passed you by.

Laziness has never won anyone anything, and neither has weakness.

As a society we need stronger, grittier men, clearly. But on an individual level, if there’s any ounce of you that wants to improve, to become better than the man you currently are, you, like I, are going to have to toughen up.

You’re going to have to forgo many of the habits that you’ve incurred over the years and replace them with new ones.

That is where this article comes in. We’re going to draw the battle lines and give you the weapons to fight.

A pussy is simply a wuss, a weaker version of the warrior within. Don’t get all politically correct and note that it’s also a slang term for a female body part. That’s clearly not what we’re talking about here so bugger off.

When you know what your enemy looks like, where it resides, and how it fights, you can then defeat it with persistence and diligence.

“If you’re going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don’t even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery–isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you’ll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you’re going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It’s the only good fight there is.” ~ Bukowski

You Know You’re a Pussy If…

1. You blame others 

This is the route most people take in life because it’s easier to blame others. It’s tough to accept responsibility or just accept that things are and deal with them accordingly.

You’re a pussy if you think that the system or the government or rich people or your parents or your friends or your teachers are to blame for your lack of whatever you want in life, because you give them power over your present and your future and your thoughts. (Read This: The System is Set Up for You to Succeed)

The act of blaming others is literally the act of relinquishing power, and a man who has no power over his thoughts or his future cannot in any logical sense call himself a man. Viktor Frankl saw this in the Concentration Camps of the Second World War. Some accepted their reality, and survived, others wished it weren’t so, and didn’t. Furthermore, others clung to a false hope that things weren’t as they are and didn’t survive either.

Accept your present and determine what you can do to make it better. This is your duty in life, no matter where you are in life. It’s when you take control of your own thoughts and actions that you can then help others do the same.

The encouraging point is that everyone has the ability to control their thoughts, actions, and degree of effort. Thus, making each of us responsible for where we end up and what we do with our lives, no one else can take this responsibility from us unless we willingly give it to them.

2. You complain.

Complaints are of the utmost un-masculine nature. When we think of a man’s man it’s the strong, silent, do whatever it takes mould that comes immediately to mind. To complain is to be weak. To shut up and work your ass off is to be strong.

This doesn’t mean you don’t have feelings or struggles or things you have to deal with, that’s not the point here. The point is the growing desire for us to talk about others and about our problems. Conversations start with a complaint, and delve into more of them.

You cannot live from a position of strength if you complain. Fortunately, complaining is yet another thing that’s under your control.

3. You quit.

This is usually the definition of a pussy. It’s the kid who’d always cry when you played sports growing up, then run home and get coddled by his parents. It’s no wonder that this kid was always being coddled by a teacher or a parent, he was getting the attention that he wanted and the adults merely reinforced his behaviour.

Come adulthood, this fella’s likely unable to stick to a job, making excuses for things that are his own fault. If you’re this guy, I plead with you to change your ways. Within you is a guy who goes beyond the pain, beyond the discomfort, a warrior. (Read This: 10 Qualities of the Modern Day Warrior)

4. You run from a fight.

In no way am I condoning fighting. But sometimes it’s required. And one of the best ways to know who your true friends are is to look to your left and your right and your back and see who’s stuck with you when your back is against the wall.

The pal’s who run when physical harm is in the cards will run when the shit hits the fan in life. You want friends who will stand and fight and take whatever comes and dish is out just as good. Look in the mirror and be real with yourself. Are you this guy?

Get over this fear of physical harm, it’ll keep you from enjoying life’s adventures and from being a good friend. It’ll prevent you from being a defender of the weak, of your family, and of your community. Join a boxing gym, just do something that will allow you to stand and fight like a man if that situation ever comes up. And if you have goofball pals like mine, it definitely will.

5. You’re lazy.

I can be lazy, so again, I’m not pointing the finger here. This is a battle I fight daily and one I’m proud to say I win the vast majority of the time.

Laziness has to be seen as a sin, a slap in the face of those who’ve come before you, fought wars for your freedom, worked two jobs to send you to school, given birth to you instead of aborting you, pushed you to succeed, taught you, led you, raised you.

Laziness has never won anyone anything.

To ensure you’re being tough, gritty, and good, first see laziness as the ultimate enemy, then craft the routine necessary to defeat it.

For myself, I have to win my morning. I need to get up early, make a coffee, and just work. I need to simplify. I need to forge a strict routine that I follow religiously.

Honor those who’ve come before you by giving everything you have to give.

We’ll end this with a Teddy Roosevelt quote that encompasses the illogical nature of laziness…

“Let us rather run the risk of wearing our than rusting out.” ~TR

The Pussy in You vs the Warrior in You

We all have a weak side and a strong side, an evil side and a good side. In both instances we need to feed the strong and quell the weak, feed the good and starve the evil.

This is done through our habits, and our awareness of what is weak and what is strong, and which actions and thoughts will lead us to be strong men. Hopefully this article helps you define those battle lines and fight the good fight.

About The Author

Chad Howse: Chad’s mission is to get you in the arena, ‘marred by the dust and sweat and blood’, to help you set and achieve audacious goals in the face of fear, and not only build your ideal body, but the life you were meant to live. He’s a former 9-5er turned entrepreneur, a former scrawny amateur boxer turned muscular published fitness author. He’ll give you the kick in the ass needed to help you live a big, ambitious life.
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