Our degree of happiness hangs on the amount of choices we can make that determine how we live.
And the amount of choices we can make is subjective.
Some feel as though life happens to them, while others feel as though they get to choose how their life happens.
Some feel bad things happen and that’s that, while others see not the thing as the problem to solve, but how they react to it.
Many of the choices we make have become non-conscious in that we’re not fully aware that we’re making them or that we have a choice in making them.
We fall into the habit of turning on the TV early on a weekend, and before we know it the day’s lost.
We feel like crap.
We got nothing done.
Our view of who we are has moulded into a lazy TV watcher, when it was a moment where we chose to do so.
Every second we face choices that determine our present and our future, but too many of these choices are determined by our past.
Sure, the past is important.
We need to reflect on it to learn from it, but we are not relegated to repeat it, nor do all of the lessons of our past fit the choices we have to make in the present.
Take relationships, for example.
Many people have a bad relationship and they let it influence all future relationships.
They become guarded and cynical so as to avoid the risk of having their heart broken again, and in doing so they never open themselves up to finding love.
They guarantee failure by avoiding risk based on their past experiences.
Sometimes our past is the worst thing we can use to judge our present choices.
It’s clouded by who we were then, by who else was involved, by time during that period, and so on.
It appears that each choice we have to make should be measured not on who we’ve been, but who we want to become.
Spend frivolously on things you don’t need because that’s just what you’ve always done?
Would you rather be rich or poor? Forget who you’ve been and make the decision based on who you want to be knowing that buying things to look and feel successful isn’t how to actually become successful.
Want to find the right lady but have been burned in the past?
Well, take risks based on what you want, don’t avoid them based on what has happened in the past.
Do you feel safe when you relax and watch TV because it excuses you from the risks involved in effort and time to improve, to build a business, and to succeed?
Take the risk.
It’s almost always beneficial to take the risk that’s associated with what you want rather than avoiding it because of who you have been.
And let go of who you have been.
We tell ourselves stories about who we are, and we re-enforce them by choice, by habit.
Thus, we become who we were increasingly so, rather than becoming who we want to be.
It’s a cycle that claims almost everyone’s potential.
We habitually do things that hold us back, hold us down, and that we’d ultimately like to stop without sitting in the moment and realizing that we have a choice.
Life is risk and life is choice.
We choose who we want to be, not our parents, not society, not even our current circumstances determine who we are. We do.
We do so by taking risks that scare us, that are difficult, that break habits we’ve developed over time.
We have so many choices in the run of a day that we’ve become unaware of.
So, become aware.
You know on some level what you want. Well, what do you have to do to get it?
And not get it now or in a few months, most of the great things in life take years to get, and that includes becoming who you can potentially become.
Be in it for the long haul while focusing only on what you can do today.
Start making the hard choices you have to make to get what you want.
Start taking the big risks that can ultimately make your life great.
Stop blaming others or other things for how your life is and take 100% responsibility for it.
Have these choices be pulled by your future, your grand, audacious, ambitious future. Keep your eye on that prize and become who you have to become to create it.
P.S. Get in the habit of thinking clearly. Read for 30-minutes every morning, spend 10 minutes thinking and journalling, and take Man Brain every morning at 9am. Make it habitual.