Home Stoic Why You Don't Trust Yourself

Why You Don’t Trust Yourself




Last night before bed I wrote out a series of contracts with myself…

They range from daily HIIT workouts, to work, and exactly what I’ll accomplish each week.

Writing them down simply solidifies that they’re real.

However, we’re always ‘writing’ contracts with ourselves, and we’re always breaking these contracts.

You’ve done it before, probably recently – as have I.

I’m going to learn a new language.

I’m going to learn to play the guitar.

I’m going to start my own business.

I’m going to workout.

I’m going to stop watching porn.

I’m going to be more frugal.

I’m going to read for an hour a day… and so on.

Over time these things we tell ourselves become less important, less believable, and for a very dangerous reason…

We don’t trust ourselves to actually do what we set out to do!

How horrible is this??

Over time, we’ve proven to ourselves that our word means nothing.

That we won’t follow through on what we’ve set out to do.

How do you treat someone you don’t trust?

You don’t depend on them. You only tell them surface level stuff. And if you ever really need them, you have no faith that they’ll actually follow through.

Apply this to yourself!

If you don’t trust yourself you have no chance of living the life you want to live…

You’ll water down your goals…

You’ll aim lower, cheat, look for the easy way out, make excuses for yourself, lie to yourself.

Deep down you’ll despise yourself.

We may not be aware of this lack of trust we have with ourselves…

It may be so deep down and ingrained in who we are that we think it’s who we are.

What it really does is remove any possibility for confidence.

If you don’t trust yourself you cannot have confidence that you’ll do what it takes to get what you want.

Thus, you’ll never get what you want in life.

You won’t get the money, the woman, the body, the adventurous existence.

You’ll spend your life living in a bubble of mediocrity all because you continually break contracts you have with yourself.

You’ll live life being ashamed of who you are, and it’ll be so subconscious that you won’t really know what’s going on.

Being that you’ve read this far, maybe you’re realizing this to be true in some areas of your life.

I have, do, and am doing something about it.

1. I’m hyper aware of the internal chatter going on in my brain.

I’m shutting my ‘monkey mind’ down, and listening to the contracts I set with myself.

2. I’m writing these contracts down.

I know what I want in life. I know what it takes to get what I want. My ‘gut’ is typically right.

My gut voices itself in whispers to myself, and I have to pay attention to these whispers that tell me to…

Work for one more hour…

To do that cardio that I hate to do…

To book that trip because I’m nervous about doing so…

To not buy that thing because I’m not buying it for me, but to portray something to others…

This internal moral compass we have is strong, but over time it weakens because it doesn’t trust us to follow through on these correct actions.

If there’s anyone that deserves our trust, that requires it for our happiness, our feeling of worthiness, for our success in life, it’s us.

And every time we don’t do what we set out to do, what we know we have to do, we break that trust, we diminish our potential, we degrade the kind of life we’re capable of living, and we open the door to depression, envy, and mediocrity.

Taking these little internal contracts you have with yourself serious is a MUST!

Start today.

Spend one day doing what you set out to do.

Avoid doing the things you want to avoid.

Simply be who your internal voice is telling you to be.

Just one day.

See how you feel, see what you get done…

Don’t worry about tomorrow, it isn’t real.

Today is all there is, and living today as best and you potentially can live is something so powerful it’s hard to comprehend.

Stay vigilant.

Be aware.

Identify these contracts, and DO NOT BREAK THEM!

The magic in this will be seen in time…

That life you thought you weren’t worthy of will be yours…

That happiness you thought you couldn’t have, you’ll have…

The money or business or health or body or relationships that you just thought ‘weren’t in your cards’, will be your life…

We spend far too much time looking outward for reasons why we aren’t thriving, when it comes down to a lack of trust with ourselves because we’ve proven ourselves that we’re not worthy of trust.

Regain that trust and a newfound confidence will take you places you never thought possible.

Get after it.

Be Legendary,
Chad Howse


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  1. Excellent article…

    “Trust thyself; every heart vibrates to that iron string.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson


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Chad Howse

Chad’s mission is to get you in the arena, ‘marred by the dust and sweat and blood’, to help you set and achieve audacious goals in the face of fear, and not only build your ideal body, but the life you were meant to live.

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