The notion that human beings are always victims to their circumstances is an affront to those bold spirits who throughout history have spent their lives prevailing over adversity. ~ Jim Stockdale
Where many fail to act like men is in the belief that their actions aren’t a result of their choices. Many feel that they act only in response to what is around them, and what is around them is usually a reason (read: excuse) to give up, quit, or to put it more eloquently, to be a little bitch.
When you’re a victim to circumstance you have – in your mind – a valid reason to be less than what you can be. After-all, what you can be isn’t a choice you make but a choice made for you by the environment you were born into. You didn’t choose the town in which you were born or the parents who conceived you. You didn’t choose where you begin, so how can you be held responsible for where you end?
If you in any way agree with this notion that your circumstances choose where you end your life and what you do in your life, you need to wake the fuck up.
This is tantamount to a heroine addiction. They have similar effects. You’re at the beacon of the drug, which in your case is the love of victimhood. When you see the odds stacked against you not as a challenge – as men see them – but as immovable barriers that can’t be climbed nor destroyed, you are at the whim of your circumstance.
If times are hard you’ll shut down rather than rising to the occasion. Your views of what can be accomplished will be incredibly safe and easy. You won’t seek challenges in your life because you believe that your life is a challenge. You’ll end up living an easier life than the man to sees obstacles as a part of life, but also as things that sharpen character and feed the life force. (Read This: IT WOULD BE A TRAGEDY TO NEVER FACE ADVERSITY IN YOUR LIFE)
Just like heroine addicts often need an intervention or a moment where they hit rock bottom, if you don’t wake the fuck up as fast as humanly possible you’ll end your life regretting nearly every day you “lived”. You’ll go through your years without tasting life’s beautiful highs nor it’s crushing lows. You’ll confine yourself to the middle, to safety, to purgatory.
You are in control of how you react and how you see the world.
You can see life both as it is, and the tough times and setbacks as challenges. And in seeing life as such, set yourself up to be able to act like a fucking man. Or you can ignore the myriad examples of men before you, those bold spirits who’ve prevailed over adversity that you can’t even imagine simply because to them, that was the only choice to make.
You cannot rise to the call-to-action set out in this article if you don’t know that who you are and who you can be is forged in tribulation, stress, and pressure, when you accept responsibility for who you are and how you act, and make the decision to persist.
Without the understanding that adversity is opportunity, and quitting, taking the easy road is a horrible choice, you won’t be a man – not in the sense we’re talking about. You’ll live your life as a boy, a male, someone under the foot of his boss, the bitch to his wife, the embarrassment to his kids, and the loser at the office.
You need to look yourself in the mirror and ask yourself, am I that guy?
Do you think that your circumstances dictate your actions?
Even more, are you one of those guys who thinks that all successful people are successful because they cheat or they were born successful?
In other words, do you think their circumstances shaped their lives, and had you grown up under those same circumstances, you’d be in their shoes?
From both angles you’re giving the circumstance the power. Circumstance is just a thing that gives us a choice. Some choose to act like men, to work hard, persist, and evolve, grow, and learn. Others choose to quit, to complain, cry, whine, and wish things were different.
The latter take their frustrations out on those around them, making their family’s lives miserable as well as their own, while the former rise to the challenge. They man up and take those lucky enough to be a part of their life with them, either by showing them the way through their actions, or by leading while always holding a hand back to bring others with them.
Either way, one is a winner. One adheres to the Ancient Greek motto, always be the best, while the other thinks that being the best isn’t in his cards. He’s willing to accept help from others without any intention of using said help to stand on his own two and live a life that both he and his family can be proud of. (Read This: Always Be The Best)
Come to grips with how you think and the worldview you hold.
Understand that it’s impossible to be the man you admire if you also see yourself as a victim to circumstance.
Be selective with the evidence you choose to see and believe. See those who’ve prevailed over adversity. There are countless stories of people who’ve faced far greater odds than you. Be like them.
If you’re willing to man up and see the world through powerful lenses, keep reading. If you’re insistent on being a victim, this book will be of little use to you. Actually, you’re pretty much fucked. At least you have that choice. Make the right one for shit’s sake!
Be a man.
About The Author
Chad Howse: Chad’s mission is to get you in the arena, ‘marred by the dust and sweat and blood’, to help you set and achieve audacious goals in the face of fear, and not only build your ideal body, but the life you were meant to live. He’s a former 9-5er turned entrepreneur, a former scrawny amateur boxer turned muscular published fitness author. He’ll give you the kick in the ass needed to help you live a big, ambitious life.
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